Expanding My Territory
• Headspaces
Recently, in my newfound enthusiasm, I’ve been thinking of things to try that I may like even though at first I wasn’t paticularly thrilled by the idea. One such example is the prickly cock confinement device. How the hell could I have thought I wouldn’t enjoy it? And that’s before you’ve added richard’s response into the equation.
Although I am a little bit squeamish about blood, I’m going to see how far I can go with it, within my own personal tastes. I know that being more ‘brutal’ would mean a lot to my pet and to be honest I like the idea of increased cruelty - it is just a bit more tricky when it’s someone you really care about. As I have said many a time, improved health would also put my mind at ease, because it seems like your body would be less prone to harm.
But I’m getting sidetracked. One way of dealing with the blood is not to cause it so directly and closely by cutting with a knife; for example - using boots with spurs on them, or some other more remote way which is safe and controllable.
I also have a sudden urge to use one of those spikey wheels that you can run across the skin. Small amounts of blood I am thinking I can cope with, but I could never go as far as senseless brutality or anything remotely approaching that that I have been reading in the recent weblog I linked to.
In general I do hope to let go more when it comes to intensity of the pain. Perhaps I might do a simple S+M session where I can experiment with different levels of intensity and ask pet how they feel, and what some this one particular noise I sometimes hear means which I generally back off when I hear - possibly for nothing but erring on the side of caution.
Comments
I do wish that prickly cock toy were bigger (thankfully at least here I can say that without sounding vain). I’ll look at leather tools and see if I can’t add a loop.
I kind of have to push away my very strong need to just submit to you to remember that I did enjoy doing S&M for the sake of it and learning. And you are 100% right in suggesting doing more of that so you can better judge my response, the effect of certain things.
You know how much your cruelty means to me. And no one reading this should ever doubt the genuine joy in suffering at the hands of someone who loves you. Nor doubt the care that is always in the back of your mind.
If I ever get hurt it will be because I begged for it; not because you didn’t exercise prudence.
Posted by: Richard | January 20, 2006 2:47 AM