Top Drop or Inertia?
• Headspaces
Today I found myself wondering if my sadistic side had somehow evaporated. Richard and I were sitting in the living room, both of us seeming somewhat bored and lethargic. My sleep has been disturbed recently and I am more delicate than Richard - things like this can leave me feeling glazed and unresponsive under the surface.
While Vanilla responses flow easily and with little effort, entering into Top Space seems to require an almost burning passion. I also know Richard has been experiencing something you might call Bottom Rise (hey, it’s the verbal opposite of Top Drop and I thought it would get a laugh!), which makes the thought of being hurt a little scary and uncertain for him (not to be confused with a lack of desire to submit).
Both of us are in an inertia state, though I feel, perhaps wrongly, that it is my job to initiate play. This is not something that is going to stop our D/s play dead, though this is the first time I’ve felt a block and/or inhibitions in this area.
Another factor is the emotional pressure in our relationship due to being separated and reunited constantly, and the fact that it is essentially two relationships in one (the Kinky and the non-Kinky - both need tending in totally different ways). Someone lacking comprehension may assume we are just less enthusiastic or capable of being kinksome - nothing could be further from the truth.
Now, poor old pet is being sick again, but I don’t rule out all hope for fun tonight :)