Nothing Much To Report
• Misc
Before I left the UK I was feeling a strong sense of sadism, but for one reason or another, we haven’t done anything really kinky since I’ve been back. Both of us have expressed a desire at various staggered moments, but a conglomeration of various things has ordained it not to be.
Some of the problems: Sickness brought on by food poisining (twice from the same batch of food - don’t ask); an inexplicable and severe all-over body pain which left me in agony for a few days (if I can’t get comfortable I can’t really get into D/s. I’m sure it’s different for other folks); and a kind of verbal confusion and disjointedness in this area, possibly just from lack of experience.
Richard said something that worried me - that he had killed his masochistic side so he wouldn’t overwhelm me with desire or become moody or upset if there was an imbalance (or something to that effect). I feel a little like I’ve had my map stolen from me, though this isn’t his fault - he mostly thinks of me in his decision-making.
Most of our time has been spent in the most wonderful way possible so no complaining is neccecary. The more idiosyncratic functions of our relationship should slip back into place given time and perhaps other things.